Is time on my side?

First published in Dutch  August 7, 2012 
Liever de Nederlandse tekst? http://yaramarch.blogspot.nl/2012/08/gemis.html

Is it just a week ago that I travelled home? Full of plans and ideas for two more books? After a period that I could spent all my time at my first book (‘Cupcakes en een koffer’ English translation not available yet. It means in English ‘ Cupcakes and a suitcase’, but now just at this moment I think that the English title will be ‘Murderous cupcakes’  ).

And now a week and a lot of work and experiences later my ideas seem far away. I even have to look at my notes to know what I did imagine.

Every day I think it sucks that I can’t spend all my time at the creative process anymore. That my words are not allowed to roll. Yesterday it was the first time I could add sentences and words to MC (= ‘murderous cupcakes’). It felt so good. The words took their space. And I get space in my mind. Gosh.

Today it was the first day I had a whole day for MC. I started reading it. I feel a little bit sad though.  I read, I searched for mistakes, changed words for more beautiful ones. Controlling if the facts are correct.

But I miss something. I miss the continuing story. I miss what is coming up. Everything has already been written. There is nothing new coming. It is already finished. I can’t sit on the edge of my chair. Excited. Longing for what’s next.

But on the other side I am not sad at all. Because I had the time to read, control and add. And I read already a hundred pages. Best of all I did like it!

My thoughts and ideas for my new books are vanishing…